Monday, January 23, 2017

Him

Him
In my bed
On my lips
Him
In all the right places
And I barely think of
You
In your bed
On her lips
You
In all the wrong places

Thursday, January 19, 2017

You are always here to me
In the smell of cigarettes
In the wind that rushes past the
Open window of my car
In my sheets, so nicely made
In the crackle of a flame
In the crunch of fallen leaves
No longer covered by the snow.

You are hiding in the walls
Of this empty room.
You are beneath the wood
That covers my living room floor.

You are in
Every smile
Every tear
Every drug
Every drop of blood
Every breath of air

But never by my side.

Paranoia

Hush

They are not
Staring at you

They do not know
That you don't belong

Calm
Your shaking hands

They don't know
About the blades
Underneath your garbage can

Smile

Wider

It's all okay

They believe
It's all okay

Hush

Monday, January 9, 2017

Old Friend

6/2/2016
_______________________

You come to me
After 8 years
Of radio silence.
Fifty dollars, you need
Fifty dollars, could I please?

No, no
I couldn't possibly
Absurd request
Take sixty.

Sunday, January 8, 2017

Lost Boy

You keep saying that
There's something wrong with you.
And, you know what?
You're right.
But your problem is not
That you can't get close to people.
It's not that you can't relate.
It's not that you can't empathize
Or be open or love.
Your problem
Is that you're never satisfied.
You can have
The whole world
On a silver platter
Right in front of your face
And all you can think of
Is how there must be galaxies
More beautiful than this.
You can't appreciate the moon
For all the stars.
Always longing
For the next season
The next year
The next something.
Never realizing
That what you've always wanted
Has been right there
All along.

Just Believe

Oh, I can tell that you are
Giving up on me
Disappointment in your eyes, my failure's
All that you can see
And I know that I
Have said this all before
But I need you to hear me
Just this one time more

Please, will you listen?
Please, will you stay?
I don't know what I'd do
If you walked away, oh

I know I'm a mess right now but
Someday I'll shine
I know I seem hopeless today
But in time
I'll be beautiful, wonderful
Everything you wanted me to be
Please, just believe

I understand why you don't want me
Anymore
I can see it in the mirror
I am not who I was before
But I promise I'm trying
I will be better someday
And I need you by my side if I'm
Ever going to be okay

Will you listen?
Please, will you stay?
I don't know what I'll do
If you walk away, oh

I know I'm a mess right now but
Someday I'll shine
I know I seem hopeless today
But in time
I'll be beautiful, wonderful
Everything you wanted me to be
Please, just believe

This life is hard, I know it
Sometimes feels like you're alone. I'm
Not there like I should be
But I'm begging you, wait for me. I'm
Doing all that I can
To make this right
I know, tonight
It's not enough.
I'm not enough, I know

I know I'm a mess right now but
Someday I'll shine
I know I seem hopeless today
But in time
I'll be beautiful, wonderful
Thoughtful, so grateful
All that you needed me to be
Please, just believe.

Saturday, January 7, 2017

Definitely Inspired by Country Music

1/03/2017
______________________

I know that you haven't forgotten about me
Even though it may seem like it sometimes
Because that's just not how it works.
You can't just forget.
And I know that
Even if this girl is the love of your life
Even if you marry her
Even if you're with her forever
Even if you never admit it,
Someday, you will have
The same sudden crushing sadness
That you dealt with for years
When you remember
That you finally had
The one that got away
And you tossed her aside
And you killed her
For no real reason at all
And you will regret.
Because that's what you do.
You regret.

I can only hope that, by then,
I will be living the life
That I always dreamed of living.
I can only hope that, by then,
I won't remember you at all.